Sunday, 12 August 2007

My waterfight with Stephen Colbert - the REAL story

I am completely hacked off with Stephen Colbert. He's a whinging chav in a suit. How the hell he gets off treating guests on his show like he does, I'll never understand. I've just been stewing about this on my own, but since the story has apparently hit the blogs, I've got to tell my side.

So I'm on his show, and he's going on and on, trying to get me to sign some piece of s**t. I'm Richard Branson, and run 250 different companies! I don't sign anything unless it's been through the right advisors on my team (believe me, I totally f**k things up if I don't.) Anyway, next thing I know he's wrapping up the interview without even mentioning Virgin America, my gift to the airline industry of America. Well, I show him what I think about that by throwing my cup of water in his face. Take that, arsehole! Well, then he managed to get some water of his own, and threw it at me. Then the time for the interview was really over.

Stephen is a slimy codfish, and completely dis-respectful of his guests. Some of you may think I have been a bit laddish with my water throwing bit, but I don't give a toss. I'm not an uptight corporate CEO who's going to take s**t from a slimy codfish and not fight back.

Of course, if this is the first time you're hearing about this event, you can check out more here.

My advisors tell me that the Codfish actually has the bollocks to air our little waterfight, so you'll be able to see it soon.

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